The last couple of days, I’ve been cleaning/purging our house. There are so many useless things sitting in boxes and around the house that it is almost sad. I didn’t realize how many things we kept because we might someday need it, or because we thought that the other wanted to keep it. I also didn’t realize how much I have left over from my childhood that I am not letting the kids play with. What’s the point of keeping that stuffed animal that I got as a kid and carried around all the time, if it’s just going to sit in a box? What’s the point of keeping blankets that were crocheted by my great-grandmother if they are just going to die in some box somewhere?
So, I took all those things out and I gave them to my kids. I had so much left over from childhood that I didn’t realize I had. I have at least 10 different stuffed animals that I gave them, I had an outfit that I wore as a tiny, tiny baby, that when I got older was an outfit I used for my baby dolls, so I gave that to Thing 2 to let her use for her baby dolls, and those blankets I have that my great-grandmother made are now safely tucked around baby dolls in baby beds, keeping Thing 2’s babies safe from the cold.
It felt good to get rid of some stuff, it felt good to throw away stuff that can’t be used and it felt really good to re-purpose some of the stuff that we’d been holding on to for sentimental reasons, or for no reason at all.
We’ll be moving to a smaller place in June, because we’re moving so I can finish my BA. We’ll probably live in an apartment, rather than a huge house, to save money and cut back on expenses (heating a 1500 sq. ft. home cost a lot more than a 1000 sq. ft. apartment). Either that or a town home, which I hate, because I really don’t like things being on different levels, I tend to just shuffle the mess from one level to another.
I don’t really like to clean. No, I hate cleaning, and during my battle with depression, I would actually not clean as much as I should’ve. It would be a battle of how long I could go without cleaning a room before my husband throws a fit. It was difficult to see myself living this way. This year I decided it would be a new, happier year. So I went to therapy last year and got some issues worked out. I made my resolutions and put them here for the world to see, and I put them all over my house so that I can remember what they are.
I’ve decided that this year is going to be different because I have so much to accomplish this year. I’m graduating with my AA in May, I’m moving on to a University in June, my son is starting Kindergarten in August, and I want to be happy, healthy and whole during these moments, because they are life-changing moments.